I know I’m going to get worked up writing this, but I have to get it out of my system. I saw this clip recently on Tik Tok showing a woman described as having ADHD as she goes about her day doing housework, bouncing from task to task. Like, entering the dreaded laundry room, pet bowls in-hand fresh from the dishwasher, only to find wet clothes needing to go into the dryer and dry clothes (in the dryer) that need to go into a basket, folded, and put away (laundry is a cycle of hell), and eh, the water dishes are empty and there is a piece of cat cigar on the floor. Water bowl? Dang. When did I change that last? No wonder they are slurping from the toilet.
Is this you? It is most certainly me. And I take offense to the ADHD remark, as this is the only way to get everything done. And still go to bed with clothes hanging out of drawers and cat toss on the landing.
This is how busy they have made us. This is how we live our lives if you still have kids at home, pets, work, and do a dozen other things like cook, distill water, grow tomatoes from seed, take out the trash, download photos from the phone, pay bills, walk dog, change password, put out the trash (when you realize you forgot and hear the collector coming down the alley) … and the beat goes on.
You see, all of these things are compounded by technology that ultimately lied to us and lured us in with “make you more efficient” and “save you time” nonsense, BS propaganda. Technology has made us 10 times busier and it continues to diminish our quality of life. This is what we spend our waking hours doing. Figuring all these apps out, why can’t I just buy the ticket there with cash?
Think about how much time you spend dealing with apps, software issues due to continuous upgrades that make you do something tried/true/and easy another way, or trying to get someone on the phone, learning new apps for everything, with their un-intuitive names that have no connection to what they do. No, no, no, not “sticky,” rather pointlessly desperate to be unique in the most annoying way possible. You shouldn’t have to be told that this “Chicksliide” (with two “i’s”) app is a way to do calendaring. What is the connection? Why call it something that’s not only random and unrelated to what it does, but not even clever, just a blend of works and extra letters for the sake of being um, what, you call this unique? I call it annoying.
Yep this, how we live our lives 2022. Learning what Chicksliide is and how it has to do with keeping your calendar.
Can I please toss everything, as I run as fast as I can to the ocean, dropping apps, clothing articles, cell phones, devices, headphones, and not look back… ever, splashing into the surf, where the water is warm and supportive, intuitive, and reasonable. Who’s with me?
Today, I cancelled some health coverage again (I switched) and yet, although I had already thought I had done this, the charge appeared—again—on my credit card. I called, then was placed on hold, then bad connection, then lost connection. I called again. This time the recording said something or other about the call cannot go through and to call again later. What? Really? I tried again. Same. I waited, called again, and then, just got that repetitive zzz zzz zzz. I am not talking about sleep, come on, you know that sound that means: your eff’d.
So, I called another number, this time I got a human being—remember those? A live person answered the phone. What? “Is this a real person,” I said? “Yes,” he said. Okay, I had a live one, so I explained my situation and he went on to say how I had “not” actually cancelled my coverage. I said I called and cancelled last month and he said, I canceled just one part, but the other part was another company and I need to call that WTF company. WTF?
He mumbled the name, so I said, “Can you tell me that again?” and he did. I took notes like a Mad Men 60tys shorthand secretary on speed. I asked him again (I got smart and said, “you broke up there, can you repeat that?” and he did.) I think, had I asked again, (not saying he “broke up”), the line might have gone to zzz zzz zzz … Hello? HELLO? Hell Ohhhhhh?
I told him again (for the record and to let him know I was on to his freakin’ schtick) that I had cancelled and, “Oh, what went wrong?,” I said. “I was charged again even though I had cancelled!”
He said (again), you didn’t call the other company and this time, when he said it, his words lit the fuse of my rocket, shuttle, whatever the eff you want to call it, and I was one second from lift off, on the way to the moon (as the first human there, you go figure that one out).
But I kept my cool. Had I exploded into spray of expletives and rocket fuel that sent a lot of saliva into the phone, I figured, I’d piss him off get charged again next month.
So, guess what I did?
I said, “Okay, thank you, Bye Bye,” and then I slammed the phone down like I wanted to break it into a zillion plastic shards (phones have a lot of resilience) and, I . . .knew I would get worked up writing this.
—Sketch
letters from sketch 